To Pee, Continued

We spent the last day of our vacation with our good friends the Samahas, at their beach club. I, having never before been to a beach club, thoroughly enjoyed the experience. It seems that beach clubs on the Jersey Shore are somewhat like rec centers in land locked areas: they provide a place for fun, gathering, and swimming. I would say that there is much less emphasis on exercise, which is why I have decided that if I ever live near the Jersey Shore, I will most definitely join a beach club. There is really something to be said for having a cabana boy lay out your chairs for you and put them away at the end of the day.

The boys had a ball digging a huge hole in the sand with their friends Matt and Jillian, and wading out into the water to boogie board. Of course, we hit the crucial "first potty-stop" point in the day when Connor looked at me with pleading eyes and a slight jig in his step and said, "Mommy I really have to go potty!" Having learned my lesson from our prior trip to the beach, I was fully prepared to take him to the bathroom which was, thankfully, only steps away. However, when Matthew (a seasoned 10 year-old beach-goer) overheard Connor he said, "Dude, why don't you just go in the ocean?"

"Thank you Matthew!" I burst out. "I have been trying and trying to tell these two that everybody pees in the ocean, but they refuse to believe me!"

By this time, we have Kirby's attention and he asks Matthew, "Do you just go in your pants?"

"Yeah," Matthew replied. "But the water washes it away...everybody does it."

"Oh yeah," Kirby says casually, "I do that all the time."

Unable to keep my mouth shut, I exclaimed, "Oh come on, Kirby. You do not! I couldn't pay you to do it the other day!"

"I do too!" Kirby cried. "I pee in my pants all the time!"

Matthew's response: "Dude...you pee in your pants?"

Right. I'm not certain Kirby got his message across there, but it would seem that he finally got the message. Now...fast forward to this past Wednesday, when we were home in our own backyard. Kirby, Connor, and their cousin spent the afternoon playing in their swimsuits, sliding on the slip 'n slide, and having water fights. I had set up a very small pool for them to use to cool off and to refill their water guns. After lying in the hot sun for awhile, I decided to cool myself off by dipping my feet in the pool.

"Oh! This water feels so good." I told my aunt (who also happens to be my good friend - I add that for her benefit, so that you will know she is young - an aunt by marriage) "It is perfect! Not freezing cold, but just perfectly refreshing!"

My aunt stared at me, skeptically, unconvinced.

"Come on, you've got to put your feet in here," I said splashing my tootsies and enjoying the cool down.

"Uh, no thanks," She said, staring at the slightly murky water, which by this time was choc full of floating grass.

"What," I taunted her, "do you think one of the boys peed in it? Is that it?"

"I wouldn't be surprised," she said.

"Oh come on!" I tossed back. "Hey you guys!" I yelled over to the three boys who were toweling off, "Did any of you pee in this little pool?"

Jadon screwed up his face and gave me a look like I was crazy, Connor bunched up his bushy little eye brows and pursed his lips with an exasperated, "No-wuh!" But it was the look on Kirby's face that stopped me cold.

"Kirby peed in the yard!" Connor burst out, as if he couldn't help himself.

I looked over at Kirby, and his sheepish grin told me it was true.

"Kirby! You know better. We've talked about this since you were two! You don't pee anywhere except the toilet! ("or the ocean, or maybe sometimes, out of necessity, the side of a little highway somewhere in Nebraska" I heard a little voice telling me.) Already I could see that I had made the unforgivable mistake of sending my child a mixed message. Still, at 7 years old, you'd think he could put it all in context!

"Where did you go? Did you just pull down your pants and pee right here in front of all of our neighbors?" I asked, sweeping my arm in the direction of all of the houses across the street.

"No! I peed through my pants!" (oh crap, this was beginning to sound very familiar)

"You mean you stood out here in the yard and just peed in your pants?"

"Yeah," he shrugged his shoulders casually. "Then I sat down in the pool to wash my pants off."

Stepping gingerly out of the pool, I cast a glance in my aunt's direction. She shrugged and laughed with that knowing that's-why-I-don't-go-in-baby-pools look. I quickly looked at the 36" diameter cess pool I had been standing in and it hit me like a ton of bricks:

You reap what you sow, my friends. You reap what you sow.